Meeting The Two Who Govern Your Life

True power and peace begin not by changing the world, but by understanding the world within you. In this part, we turn our focus inward to meet the two fundamental forces that shape every thought and action: your conscious and subconscious mind. You will learn their true natures, their constant dialogue, and why this internal relationship is the most important one you will ever manage.

Jump to the Following Sections

• The most Important Relationship You Can Have in Life
• The Nature of the Conscious Mind
• The Nature of the Subconscious Mind
• There are Two Individuals Living in You
• The Four Causes of Matter
• Dreams Need Motion and Action
• Get to Know the Wise Teacher in You
• There is a Constant Battle Inside You
• The Importance of Self-Honesty
• The Power of Self-Faith
• The Vessel of Faith: Where Belief Meets the Subconscious

Table of Contents

The most Important Relationship You Can Have in Life

The Nature of the Conscious Mind

The Nature of the Subconscious Mind

There are Two Individuals Living in You

The Four Causes of Matter

Dreams Need Motion and Action

Get to Know the Wise Teacher in You

There is a Constant Battle Inside You

The Importance of Self-Honesty

The Power of Self-Faith

The Vessel of Faith: Where Belief Meets the Subconscious

The most Important Relationship You Can Have in Life

If relationships are important in life, the most important relationship you can have in life is with yourself—specifically, with your subconscious mind. I explore the mind in great detail in another chapter, but since you haven’t read it yet (this book is still a work in progress!), I’ll offer a brief explanation here.

You know that there are two minds living in you: your conscious mind and your subconscious mind.

The Nature of the Conscious Mind

The conscious mind operates only when you are awake and goes to sleep when you do. It is the mind of our five senses. This mind allows us to perceive and understand our reality through what we see, hear, smell, taste, and touch.

This is a rational, thinking mind—and it is full of judgments. These judgments help us distinguish if something is beautiful or ugly, sounds good or bad, smells pleasant or foul, tastes delicious or awful, or feels hot or cold.

The conscious mind is the immature part within us. This mind likes to avoid discomfort and always seeks comfort. When we have an itch, we scratch, hoping it will go away. When we are hungry, we are quick to fill our stomachs.

There is nothing wrong with this habit of the mind—it helps us survive. But this same habit can also lead to our destruction.

The conscious mind is full of excuses. It likes to be lazy and put things off for later, indulging in comfort now. It avoids responsibility, fearing extra work and hassle, while staying safely in its comfort zone. It dodges serious thought, offering temporary solace in liquor or drugs instead. It prefers to skip exercise today, choosing the immediate pleasure of a favorite TV show.

While the judgments of the conscious mind are essential for our survival—you wouldn’t dare cross the railroad when a train is approaching—they can also lead to more suffering. This mind likes to blame other people or external things for its problems. We say things like, they abused me, they cheated me, they mistreated me, or, If I didn’t have a flat tire today, it would have been a good day.

Our problems or happiness don’t depend on our external world or on other people; they depend on our judgments and the perceptions of the conscious mind. For example, if you are stuck in a traffic jam, you may experience frustration. But if I were with someone special on a first date in that same traffic jam, I might not feel frustrated at all because I’m enjoying good company.

The Nature of the Subconscious Mind

The subconscious mind is an irrational, thinking mind. It never goes to sleep; from the moment of conception to death, it never rests. It works for you continuously, without your awareness, even while you sleep.

The subconscious mind is the captain of your ship and the director of your life story. It is always working for you, keeping you alive. It makes you breathe, digests your food, eliminates toxins from your body, heals your wounds, and makes you shiver when you’re cold to raise your body temperature.

Unlike the conscious mind, the subconscious is nonjudgmental. It does not distinguish between sleep and wakefulness or even between life and death, because it never sleeps.

There are Two Individuals Living in You

Your conscious mind and your subconscious mind are the two individuals who live within you. These two minds experience different realities and speak different languages. While the conscious mind communicates in words, the subconscious mind speaks in images.

For example, if I ask you not to think about a rainbow, your conscious mind understands the request. Yet your subconscious mind does not, because it has already formed an image of a rainbow.

Albert Einstein once said, “Imagination is more important than knowledge.” Yes, imagination—the pictures in the subconscious mind—is what creates our reality. We dreamed of going to the moon, a vision that began as an image in the subconscious long before it became a reality. Only after that imagination takes root does the knowledge of the conscious mind come into play to turn the dream into fact.

Our subconscious mind is responsible not only for the vital functions of the body, but also for our mental and emotional well-being.

Whatever God can do for you, your subconscious mind can also do. It will take you to any destination you wish—without judgment. For example, some people choose to become brilliant scientists, mathematicians, doctors, and businesspeople, while others choose to become brilliant bank robbers, murderers, and con artists.

This doesn’t mean the subconscious mind is unethical or that it can’t teach us ethical living. It can, and it will—but it will not boss us around, dictate to us, or judge us. Instead, it allows us to learn from our mistakes. Without mistakes, we would never learn. We had to fall before we could learn to walk.

Our subconscious mind is one with the universal mind, wielding a power greater than we can fully grasp. It can orchestrate events to seize our attention and magnetize the deepest wishes of our heart. This is the law of attraction: similar minds attract similar minds. It can draw your soulmate, ideal work, abundance, and genuine friendship into your life. Think of it as your most loyal companion—a shadow that never leaves. It does not distinguish between ‘good’ or ‘bad’; it is incapable of judgment. Without condition or waiver, it is always there for you.

The Four Causes of Matter

You might wonder how the subconscious mind processes the power to create events and circumstances, attract your soulmate, and fulfill your wishes. And if this is true, why isn’t our life the way we would like it to be?

I have explained this in detail in the book, but I will summarize it here. There are four causes of matter: thoughts, temperature, nutriment, and karma.

Your house, car, phone, roads, and buildings are thought-created matter.

Trees, mountains, rivers, oceans, and planets are temperature-created matter.

The food we eat is nutriment-created matter.

Your family and loved ones are karma-created matter, because, unlike choosing your car, you do not get to pick your family.

Karma is like Sin. Karma is like gravity. And karma is like a magnet—it can be charged positively or negatively.

Consider the magnet: electrons hold a negative charge, protons a positive charge. In the same way, the intentions held in your subconscious mind attract corresponding events into your life. If you meet someone special, that is positively charged karmic matter. If you lose your job, that is negatively charged karmic matter.

Dreams Need Motion and Action

If the subconscious mind can create what we want, why aren’t our lives exactly as we wish them to be?

Because the subconscious cannot do it alone, it needs the conscious mind. The conscious mind is the master of willpower and action. While imagination is what begins a goal or a dream, it is willpower and action that bring it to life.

You can think of it this way: 90% is imagination and faith in yourself, and the remaining 10% is your action.

To get from point A to point B, you first need a vision of where point B is. Do you go north or south? Once you know, you must move—and move requires energy. Whether you walk, drive, or fly, you must expend energy to reach your destination.

Without the action of the conscious mind, our goals and dreams will remain exactly where they started: as visions.

Without imagination, we cannot dream of a goal. Without action, we will never reach the finish line.

If you stand in front of a fireplace and say, “God, I’m cold. Please give me heat,” will you receive it? No—not until you strike the match first. You must do your part and give your energy. Then, God will give you heat.

Returning to the subconscious mind: the Sun produces more energy in a single second than our entire civilization has ever used. We can tap into that same power by tapping into our own subconscious. To truly know this mind and to fall in love with it is the pathway to your genuine freedom and lasting happiness.

Get to Know the Wise Teacher in You

Fish are confined to certain depths; they cannot explore the ocean’s deepest mysteries. In the same way, the conscious mind cannot comprehend the profound wisdom of the subconscious.

All the information in our conscious mind is what we have heard or learned from others. For example, if I hold a glass and ask, “What am I holding?” you might say, “A glass.” But how do you know it is a glass? Because a parent or teacher taught you it was a glass. When you were born, you did not know what a glass was.

Yet at birth, no one had to teach you how to suck milk from your mother—you knew instinctively. Where did that instinctive wisdom come from? It came from your subconscious mind.

The information in the conscious mind is what we call knowledge. The information in the subconscious mind is called wisdom.

Our subconscious mind always tries to guide the conscious mind with its wisdom. Unfortunately, due to the immaturity of the conscious mind, it rarely listens, often ignoring the guidance it receives—because, again, it prefers to stay in its comfort zone.

When the conscious mind ignores these messages for too long, the subconscious mind creates events and circumstances to seize its attention, making itself impossible to ignore any longer.

There is a Constant Battle Inside You

The conscious mind and the subconscious mind are perpetually at odds. The subconscious constantly reminds us of what we are putting off or ignoring, but the conscious mind—preferring the comfort of distraction—often continues to disregard its guidance, indulging instead in less important things.

If you are procrastinating on something important, your subconscious mind will persistently remind you in the background, urging you to get the work done. But the conscious mind will counter with excuses to put it off.

As I mentioned earlier, this conversation is always present in our minds, but we hardly notice it, it runs in the background on autopilot. Only when we face a major problem does this internal dialogue become more visible.

This conversation doesn’t have to run on autopilot, operating outside your awareness. You can learn to actively engage with it, especially when facing troubling situations.

You might think you don’t have time to analyze all your problems. Yes, it may sound like more work for your conscious mind, but the more time you invest in yourself, the freer—and happier—you will become. This feels much better than simply going with the flow.

We give our time to everyone else, every single day—to our family, our kids, our work, our friends, and to socializing—yet we give hardly any to ourselves. We are so busy with other people that we don’t even take ten minutes for ourselves.

Your peace and happiness are more important than any other matter. Only when you are at peace with yourself can you give quality time to others. So, it would be wise to pause, contemplate, and begin a conversation with your subconscious mind—even if just ten minutes a day.

You deserve at least ten minutes for yourself, especially when you give eight hours or more to your workplace.

Take ten or fifteen minutes at the end of your day—preferably when you’re free from distractions—and have a conversation with your subconscious mind. Talk about what made you angry or upset during the day. This is a good place to start. Later, as you begin to feel its power, you can gradually increase the duration. You can even have this conversation while driving, or anytime during your day.

You might think having a conversation with yourself—with your subconscious—sounds strange or even crazy. After all, we’re often told that only “crazy people” talk to themselves. But that’s a misconception. Don’t fall into that trap, and don’t just take my word for it. It’s your responsibility to question whether what others say is true, or to learn from your own experience.

If you truly give this practice a sincere effort, you’ll be amazed at what you discover. Soon, you’ll recognize the power within it, a personal power that was always with you, waiting patiently to be known.

You can talk with your subconscious about anything you’d like to resolve or gain insight into—whether it’s anger, fear, frustration, sadness, sorrow, disappointment, laziness, doubt, addiction, the contemplation of your goals, or simply finding the motivation to get things done.

You can start small. For example, if the driver in front of you is moving too slowly and you feel agitated, try turning that frustration inward. Instead of wasting energy getting angry or trying to change the other driver, have a conversation with your subconscious to resolve your own agitation.

You can actively work through your frustration by communicating with your subconscious. The most important thing is not to fix the other person, but to resolve your own emotions—so you can reclaim your happiness. Perhaps that driver was there to point out something you needed to work on within yourself.

When you’re having this conversation, you can speak out loud if you’re alone or simply think your questions and answers clearly. Ask as many questions as you can of your subconscious, and voice—or think—every answer that comes to mind. Remember, the wisdom of the subconscious mind is deeper than the ocean, and it holds answers to all your concerns.

So, ask freely. Speak the answers as they arise. And at some point, the right answer will emerge from your own voice—and it may just surprise you.

For example, ask yourself: Why am I angry? Then speak all the answers that come to mind. You might say, “I’m angry because blah-blah-blah…” and just let the words flow. Remember, your goal isn’t to fix the other person—it’s to understand and heal yourself.

First, vent all your frustrations about the other person—call them every name in the book. Once you’ve done that, ask yourself:

What can I learn from this situation?

and

What do I need to change in myself, so this problem won’t bother me again?

When you consult your subconscious, your main goal is to change your perception of the situation—to view it differently and try to understand it with compassion.

For example, if the driver ahead is moving slowly, instead of growing angry, shift your perspective. Tell yourself: maybe they are elderly, or a teenager learning to drive. Perhaps they’re distracted by a family problem or a difficult phone call.

It doesn’t matter what the other driver’s situation actually is—what matters is your peace of mind and your emotional well-being. Do not let other people control your emotions. You are not a robot; you are in control of how you feel.

There is a story about a little girl who lost one of her favorite shoes. She was crying in the car as her father drove. Then her father noticed a man on the street who had only one leg. He pointed to the man and said, “Do you see that man? He has only one leg, and he is not crying. I can’t believe you are crying over one lost shoe.” Upon hearing that, the girl stopped crying.

This example shows how changing your perception can change your emotions. You can apply this to all your negative emotions and find true mental and emotional well-being.

When you question your subconscious mind and speak or think out loud, the right answer may not come immediately. You may need more than one session to uncover the hidden perceptions that hold you back and feed your negative emotions. Be patient with yourself—but don’t give up. Repeat the process whenever you can, until you discover the answers that will truly set you free.

After you have a conversation with your subconscious, stay aware of your surroundings. The answers you seek can appear in many forms—perhaps in something a friend says that echoes your earlier thoughts, or in a conversation between two strangers. You might even read a sign on the street that reflects what you were looking for.

You might wonder why this is possible. It’s because the intentions held in your subconscious mind create karmic matter. Events and encounters you didn’t consciously plan are exactly that: karmic matter.

In fact, the reason you are reading this now is no accident. It was orchestrated by your subconscious mind. If anything here resonates with you, that resonance is a sign—it was called forth by an intention deep within you, whether you are consciously aware of it or not.

I’ will illustrate how I speak with my subconscious later in the chapter. In fact, I have these conversations every single day—even when something small frustrates me, like someone cutting me off on the road. This practice helps me keep my emotions in check, instead of wasting time and energy blaming others for how I feel.

The Importance of Self-Honesty

To have a true conversation with your subconscious, the most important thing you need is honesty with yourself. You can lie to everyone else, but you can never lie to yourself. Even when you deceive others, deep down, your subconscious knows the truth.

Most of us are afraid to admit when we feel hurt, sad, or afraid—especially men. Many fear that acknowledging pain or fear means losing their masculinity. We’ve been taught to think sensitivity belongs only to women, not to men.

But your emotions are the guiding force of your life. Don’t be misled by what you were told growing up by your friends. Remember, the information in your conscious mind is simply what you heard from others—and it isn’t always true.

To find your truth, give the wisdom of your subconscious a chance. It can guide you in ways you never thought possible. Ignoring your emotions is like trying to drive a car without fuel.

There is nothing wrong with feeling sad, hurt, angry, fearful, or any other so-called “negative” emotion. It is part of human nature to feel pain—remember, we all suffer in this world, and no one is exempt from it. When you embrace this universal truth, you can begin to truly learn from it.

Overall, many of us hesitate to admit our mistakes and our true emotions—we worry it will make us look weak. But admitting a mistake doesn’t make you weak; quite the opposite. It strengthens you. It builds your personal power.

The main point of conversing with your subconscious is to sort through your thoughts and emotions in order to find solutions. If you go to a doctor and lie about your symptoms, you won’t receive the right medication. Similarly, if you hide your true feelings or intentions from your subconscious, you’ll struggle to find genuine answers—and you may still feel empty inside.

But if you become completely honest with your subconscious, it can help you release pent-up emotions, uncover real answers, and leave you feeling truly free.

You can’t simply put a bandage over your emotions; they won’t disappear until you become truly mindful of them and work through them. The longer you live in denial, the larger your problems will grow. Your subconscious mind will eventually get your attention—often by making those problems too big to ignore.

Our negative emotions have the power to teach us something valuable about ourselves. But if we waste time and energy complaining and worrying about how others might judge us, we’ll miss the boat—the chance to learn from them.

What if this coming new year became the moment, you stopped living in denial—and started truly living? By embracing the power of self-honesty and leaning into your so-called negative emotions, you can free yourself from stress and discover the joy that’s been waiting in plain sight all along.

To understand how to be honest with yourself, refer to the example conversations with my subconscious mind later in this chapter.

The Power of Self-Faith

The next essential step when conversing with your subconscious is self-faith. Believe in yourself and trust your inner wisdom. The wisdom of the subconscious mind is greater than we can fully grasp. The knowledge in our conscious mind is like a single drop of water—while the wisdom of the subconscious is the entire ocean.

What you believe is what you become. If you believe you can, you will achieve it. If you believe you can’t, you won’t. Most of us believed we could learn to drive—and that’s why we drive today. Most of us never believed we could learn to fly a jet—and that’s exactly why we can’t.

If you put your faith in your subconscious mind, it can achieve what seems impossible. Its power and wisdom exceed what your conscious mind can fully grasp. After all, some people climb Mount Everest—a feat that remains out of reach for most of us.

If you doubt yourself, you limit your possibilities. Why? Because the subconscious mind is non-judgmental. It will give you whatever you truly wish for—without question. If you want to be a doctor and do the work, it will help you become one. If you believe you aren’t smart enough, it can lead you to be a high school dropout. Whatever you feed your subconscious mind, it will produce a corresponding result, impartially and without judgment.

The Vessel of Faith:

If self-faith feels difficult, you can place your faith in whatever you believe in—whether that’s God, Christ, Buddha, God Vishnu, or anything else. Ancient people worshipped trees and rocks, seeing them as symbols of life: growth, death, and rebirth. They called it the Tree of Life.

It doesn’t matter whom or what you believe in. What truly matters is the thought you plant in your subconscious mind.

There is a story about a Buddhist temple famous for healing the sick. People believed that drinking water from the temple could cure illness. One day, a woman who lived far away fell seriously ill. Her daughter went to the kitchen, filled a glass from the tap, and brought it carefully to her mother, telling her it had come from the temple. The mother drank the water—and she got better. But the water wasn’t from the temple. Why did it heal her? Because she had faith. Her subconscious mind believed in the power of that glass of water.

When your subconscious mind is fused with faith, it can create miracles in your life.

With this understanding of our powerful internal communication, we can now turn our attention to mastering our external communications.